Women’s Shoes Rant


What is it with shoes and women? Why do they need so many? Being a male I just don’t understand. Is it just me or are other males out there that are as baffled as I am?

Women have shoes for the house, they have shoes for shopping, they have shoes for going out. Woops sorry they have hundreds of shoes for going out. They have flat ones, high heeled ones, open backs, strap backs, negative heels, platform heels, wedges, open toes, closed toes, long boots, short boots, medium boots, and they are just headers.

They have a pair of shoes for every dress they have, for every pair of trousers they have and for every pair of jeans. They even have flip flops for nearly every occasion while on holiday, I ask you flip flops with sequins, why, I just don’t understand.

Most blokes will have a pair of work shoes that will also do for going to the pub or clubbing as they won’t let you in wearing trainers. We may have a pair of boots for hiking and working in the garden.  We will have a pair of trainers and a sports shoe such as football boots or rugby boots or golf shoes and if we play both rugby and football we’ll probably use the same pair, but that it, 4 or 5 pairs tops.

And the worst thing ever is when they ask you “do you like these” yes I do love, they look exactly like the pair you bought last week. “Oh no darling, they were blue these are navy, and besides they hurt like hell”.

That’s another thing, I went to a wedding the other week and all you could hear were all the girls complaining about their shoes and how they hurt their feet. They’d hurt my feet if I had to walk on tiptoe all night and my big toe was nestled up to my little toe, it’s un-natural, it’s like trying to put a pint into a half pint glass, won’t fit.

There’s no point in saying this but, Girls listen, think about how many more holidays you could go on if you didn’t buy so many shoes.

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